Saccharine Irony

This site is a compilation of fluid thoughts, a collection of poetry, random glimpses of humor and tragedy, spontaneous notions of an extremely sensitive mind.

Contradiction December 20, 2008

jacob-jacob-black-2135537-120-90After having finished reading Eclipse, the third book in the much-hyped over Twilight saga, I am going to contradict myself. I am no longer a fan of Edward Cullen. My affection is dedicated to Jacob Black, the teenage werewolf who is not afraid to love Bella, even when he knows she is more in love with someone else.

I think in fact that if Edward Cullen were to be matched up against the more sinewy, passionate, and level-headed Jacob Black, this lullaby lovin’ vampire will fade into the background like a pale-skinned fairy. And after reading three novels worth of Edward and Bella’s interminable declarations of immortal love to one another, I am finally feeling constipated. Twilight is excusable, seeing that this book is where the budding romance of two star-crossed lovers are first chronicled for the entire saga. But when this mawkishness is still palpable in the succeeding books, what you get is an overrated sentimentality that is more trite than touching.

I’m still a giggly high school girl at heart, but there is simply nothing real about a couple who are perpetually holding hands and whispering schmaltzy sweet-nothings to one another, ALL THE TIME.

With Chris Weitz at the directorial helm for New Moon- the book in the saga where Jacob Black and the rest of the werewolves first make an appearance, and steal the bigger scene from the nauseous Bella-Edward affair- I can hardly wait for the movie next year. Please, Mr. Weitz, you ought to do better than Hardwicke, just this one time.

 

Interesting December 2, 2008

Filed under: Movies — Aimee @ 5:18 pm

I came across a blog site of serious writers recently, and I just couldn’t resist linking to this article on the entire Twilight hullabaloo. If the high school girl in me had not developed a huge crush on Edward Cullen, I will perhaps be more inclined to think in the same way. On the other hand, I still think Meyer deserves a bit of credit to her work, primarily for targeting her audience effectively.

Anyway, click here to read the article.

 

Twilight Misses Mark on the Silver Screen November 30, 2008

Filed under: Movies, Strange Men — Aimee @ 8:14 am
Tags: , ,

is481-056Before you read my review, let me remind you that I am no film making professional. I am writing all these merely from an avid moviegoer’s point of view.

I watched Twilight three days after it opened in the theatres, expecting to be blown away. The trailers had been good, Rob Pattinson and Kristen Stewart look exquisite together, and both fit the roles of star-crossed lovers Edward and Bella quite perfectly. Of course, having read Twilight and New Moon, I already knew the plot and the characters by heart.

When I left the theatre roughly two hours later however, I was beginning to think that Rotten Tomatoes could have been right in giving the movie adaptation a 44% rating. No, the movie was not awful, it was creative in some parts actually, but there was something amiss. There were more than a few things which disappointed me really, and not least among them were the acting performances of Pattinson and Stewart.

Well, I have nothing against Pattinson and Stewart as Edward and Bella physically speaking, because their chemistry just sizzles on screen. But the acting was mediocre, and I could almost feel no intensity in the delivery of their lines. Pattinson was slurring his lines (maybe because he’s still practicing his American accent) and sadly, was not able to act as gracefully, as elegantly, or as mysteriously as the “Edward” so explicitly described in the book.

There were scenes in the film when he looked as klutzy as Bella- which is totally out of character because this 103 -year old vampire is supposed to be graceful as a cat and looking perpetually like a movie star. He is not human remember? He is a vampire with super powers, who has lived for at least a century. So please explain to me why Pattinson is acting like his character is just some average boy-next-door, albeit with porcelain skin and a flashy sports car.

Stewart had her lapses too, but since she’s young and because she’s playing the role of the human, Bella, I was more ready to forgive her. Besides, she’s always been described as aloof, clumsy, moody, and anti-social in the novel. With Pattinson however, I expected a whole lot more intensity, on a level that makes you feel terrified because he’s a bloodsucking immortal, but subdued enough to remind you that he is a gentleman who’s in love with a human girl. They should have picked an actor who was more ready to play the part, and not merely because he has jawbones to die for or a stare that could melt the ice caps off Mount Fuji.

Then there was the matter of bad makeup. During the course of the film, I kept repeating to myself “They’re vampires; they’re supposed to be pale”. The fact however, that they were too-powdery pale made me want to laugh so hard. Plus, it was too obvious Pattinson was wearing lipstick! Forgive me, but that lapse was just unpardonable.

Yes, the movie was made for teens, but I don’t think that’s reason enough to make it a half-baked, on-screen rendition of arguably the most celebrated vampire love story in long years. The producers and the director should have realized that even twenty-something, thirty-something, and forty-something females are reading the Twilight books too, and that these non-teens could be lining up in theaters alongside shrieking, high-school girls during the movie’s release date. Unfortunately, not everyone is juvenile enough to let pass the hazily-depicted scenes or the almost boring pace of the film, balanced out momentarily by romantic forest interludes and heartrending lullabies.

One critic complained that the Twilight movie was made for the book readers and no one else. I couldn’t agree more. Anyone uninitiated with the Twilight universe is not likely to consider Twilight on the silver screen as a stand-alone film. If the saga wasn’t as riveting as it is, I doubt that the film would have grossed just as successfully with its $70 million weekend. It’s sad but painfully true: the movie was a box-office hit mainly because many people (mostly females) have already read the Twilight books. Or perhaps because non-readers are curious as to what the hype is all about. Whether or not the film really deserved the box-office figures is another matter altogether.

Meyer may not be an award-winning writer but she deserves credit for the way she has exploited her fertile imagination and for creating interesting characters in her brainchild of a book. And in many ways, I think, the movie sabotaged her work.

I’m still optimistic though. Summit Entertainment has already acquired the franchise for New Moon, Eclipse, and Breaking Dawn. And since the second film is slated to be released no earlier than 2010, Pattinson and Stewart will have ample time polishing their skills, and a lot more for the production designers to pick the right kind of vampire lipstick.

 

Sparkles in the Sun November 13, 2008

Filed under: Movies, books — Aimee @ 5:14 pm
Tags: , ,

mv5bmtq2nzuxmtaxn15bml5banbnxkftztcwmzeymtiwmg_v1_sx94_sy140_I’m finally done with Twilight, and now I’m looking forward to the movie, which airs next week. As much as Meyer’s writing style is certainly not worthy of a Pulitzer, the truth is, I still found myself hooked on the saga. No, I take that back, I’m hooked on Edward Cullen ( okay, non-Twilight fans, you can puke now). I mean, why does he have to be so ideal? Music and symphonies, super human abilities, killer smile, and color-changing eyes- plus the fact that he sparkles like diamonds in broad sunlight, rather than turning to dry ashes? I want to kick myself for going ga-ga over a fictional vampire, but then again, I seldom go ga-ga over anything else these days, so I’m allowing myself the pleasure.

There were a few boring parts in the book and at one point I wanted to pull Bella’s hair for being so clueless and stupid. And at another instance I wished Meyer had developed the character of Bella into a much stronger and level-headed female protagonist ( really, is it that easy deciding to be a vampire herself?) , but when the book starts referring to Edward again, I just swoon in my pillows. I have to give the author some credit for the unexpected surprises in the novel, though. It is a good read, over all, very entertaining and fantasy-inducing.

The trailers on YouTube are good, and Rob Pattinson is excellent as the mysteriously sexy Edward. Hopefully the movie does not disappoint the millions of teenage and twenty-something girls like myself who are lusting after the vampire who sparkles so beautifully in the sun.

 

So-called lessons from Sex and the City June 29, 2008

So, I finally saw the movie every fashionista has been raving about. The famed TV series where handbags, stilettos, and froufrou skirts share the same spotlight as its leading actresses. The fiery, unadulterated show of obsession over bejeweled Manolo Blahniks and monogram-crammed Louis Vuittons.

Well, you get the picture. I was not expecting to get blown away, just entertained. The good news is, I got what I wanted — entertainment in the most colorful, glittery, and paltry sense.

Surprisingly, I did get a few half-serious lessons from the movie,and (drum roll…) here they are:

1. For girls, never, never get too carried away when you’re planning your wedding. Otherwise, you’ll risk getting jilted at the altar.

2. When you’re married, and your husband cheats on you, ask yourself, “Are we having enough sex?”

3. 40 is the new 30. Marriage-wise.

4. Never accept a marriage proposal that’s thrown at you casually. The guy may just be half-serious.

5. Love your girlfriends. There’s nothing like great buddies and Saturday night margaritas.

6. Work is not everything. Get a life. Love your Hubby.

7. Sushi is supposed to be eaten by chopsticks or by hand. Not to be scattered over your naked body, while you’re lying on the dinner table. On Valentine’s day.

8. Communicate with your man. Don’t over-assume.

9. It’s perfectly fine to wear high heels at home.

10. Wearing too much color is okay. As long as you can afford Blahniks and Vuittons.

11. Apparently, sticking bird feathers through your wedding veil brings bad luck. Ask Carrie Bradshaw.

12. Don’t force your guy to write love letters. Or poetry. Or personalized wedding vows. It’s too much pressure for him, poor thing.

13. It’s decent to get married in front of a judge. Especially when you’re over forty and the guy has had two before you. Reasonable, too.

14. Go easy on packaged puddings. You might poop in your pants. Ooops…

Well, at least the movie was an eye candy from beginning to end. The dresses were enviable, the bags were fabulous, and the shoes were killer. And oh, it preaches the proverbial lesson that love can come at any age– and that it needs sex and lots of drama for sheer survival.

If there’s something that the movie dwells on other than fashion, its the L thing. L-O-V-E. Bradshaw’s book title. A key chain. A computer password. Love letters from poets of another century. Break-ups and make-ups. Typical chick flick.

Now that I think about it, I still like The Devil Wears Prada much better. Now that’s fashion eye candy with a lot more punch.

 

Couch Potato Movies April 14, 2008

Filed under: Movies — Aimee @ 7:14 am
Tags: , ,

For the past month or so, the only luxury I have allowed myself apart from my regular visits to the malls to eat siomai, is watching movies either on cable, on DVDs, or at the theatres. The weather is annoying the sanity out of me, and as much as summer is a great time for outdoor fun, there’s nothing pleasing in burning oneself under a 34 degree sun. Below is a rough list of the movies which had consoled me in my temporary state of solitary confinement.

1. The Water Horse – A movie about the mythical Loch Ness monster minus the horror. This is best watched by the entire family, since kids will obviously adore the egg-hatched sea creature. Good for a boring, rainy, Sunday afternoon.

2. Silk - Lovely, sad, haunting, sensual. A French silk trader became enamored with a beautiful Japanese girl, and as soon as he comes home to his wife, he starts receiving letters from the girl halfway across the world.

3. The Mist – Placid and uninteresting at times, except towards the end when the twist of the story delivers an unconventional conclusion. Gotta admire Mr. Stephen King’s courage and originality when it comes to playing with human emotions in his fiction. And oh, the monsters were downright disgusting.

4. P.S. I Love You – Hillary Swank and Gerard Butler were lovely in this movie. Funny and heartbreaking. Plus, Holly Kennedy’s shoe designs are exquisite.

5. The Other Boleyn Girl – Great for a crash course on British history. I was forced to read up articles on King Henry VIII and his wives: Catherine of Aragon, Anne Boleyn, Jane Seymour, and Katherine Parr, and many other unnamed mistresses. However, the movie did not remind me of old England except for the lavish costumes. It’s a nice thing Eric Bana is smashing gorgeous because the real King Henry was anything but.

6. Catch and Release – Saw this on cable. Good, quirky fun. Reminds us of the complexity of human affairs and its repercussions.

7. Atonement – Beautiful, tragic, memorable. Keira Knightly and James McAvoy could burn the silver screen with their passionate chemistry. Remind me to buy the novel.

8. My Bestfriend’s Wedding – My all-time favorite romantic comedy. Saw it again for the nth time. My heart grieved for Julia Robert’s character for the nth time. Made me want to play “The Way You Look Tonight” over and over again. Sigh.

9. Doomsday – Pathetic excuse for a film. Buy a McDonalds Burger meal or go get your hair trimmed. Your money will have better uses. No other comments.

10. Horton Hears a Who- is very charming. Horton the elephant found a speck which turned out to be an entire planet where the city of “Whoville” is in thriving existence. So he takes care of it and even risks life and limb for the microscopic “Whos”. Maybe the country’s leaders could learn a valuable thing or two from Horton who always says with conviction that “a person’s a person no matter how small.”

 

Strawberry Fields in My Mind January 30, 2008

Filed under: Movies — Aimee @ 5:54 am
Tags: , ,

51v60r1lril_aa240_.jpg This movie musical – Across The Universe – is lovely. The timeless Beatles’s songs are rendered exquisitely, and the production is a visual pleasure. After watching it, I can’t keep Strawberry Fields Forever out of my mind. Oh, and did I mention Jim Sturgess is the ultimate eye candy? ;-)

 

marshmallow lines September 26, 2007

Filed under: Movies — Aimee @ 6:11 am
Tags: ,

***********************************************************************

Since I was not able to finish watching the film adaptation of Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice many months ago, just as I was barely able to finish the novel itself, I watched it again last night until well past midnight. Although I cannot list the movie as one of my favorites, there have been a few memorable lines that turned my insides into gooey marshmallow. First, it was when, against a backdrop of blinding sunrise and subdued green fields, Mr. Darcy declared to Elizabeth Bennet, My feelings have not changed. You have bewitched me heart and soul, and I love, love, love you.

And then, when Elizabeth spoke privately with her father on how she loves Mr. Darcy, and how her prejudices about him have been all mistaken, Mr. Bennet, teary-eyed and smiling, replied, I cannot believe that anyone can deserve you. But it seems I am overruled. So I heartily give my consent. I could not have parted with you, my Lizzie, to anyone less worthy.

Remind me to read the novel again.

************************************************************************